Genderswap
by Kyatto no Edo
Summary: [AU] Mai X Zuko] Thanks to a strange virus, one morning Zuko and Mai wake up to find that they had mysteriously swapped genders! How will this affect their relationship? [Please R&R!]


_**Genderswap**_

A Maiko ficlet

By: _Kyatto_

**Disclaimer:** I own no one and nothing in "Avatar" and make no money from writing this.

**Note(s):** This is based on a modern day setting RPG where Mai and Zuko were forced to swap genders. They live in an apartment in Hong Kong, and both work part time at a coffee shop. I thought it'd be funny to write about how they'd deal with it. Enjoy!

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"This is ludicrous."

Mai turned slightly and peered over his shoulder. "Tell me about it."

"I know I've never been you know _nice_ to women, but this is not a very fair punishment," Zuko grumbled, lightly running her hands along her rather obvious curves.

"You think I _like_ being a guy?" Mai arched a brow, glowering at her, and sat on the edge of the bed.

Sighing, Zuko stared up at the cracked off-white ceiling as she lay flat on the bed, her shoulder-length dark hair fanned out behind her head, her bangs parted to fall over one eye. It'd only been a few hours since the former he had come to the shocking realization that he'd turned into a woman, and vice versa for his girlfriend. Now she was at a loss as to what to do. There'd be no way she could go to work; it'd be damn near impossible to explain to her boss and coworkers. As it was she was being laughed at enough. The last thing she wanted to do was to venture outside, where anyone, especially Azula, would see what had happened. She could hear Azula's laughter now, her maniacal cackle ringing in her ears. It wasn't something she was fond of.

"There has to be a way to fix this," Mai said quietly, almost unsure of himself. He was still, his hands folded in his lap, his gaze on the floor. The large, oversized 'The Who' T-shirt hung weird on his lank frame. His left collarbone was revealing itself as the head-hole dropped too far down. The jeans he was wearing were long and baggy, his feet impossible to see unless he hiked up his pants. With the sudden gender change, his original clothes no longer fit right so he had to make do with borrowing from his boyfriend-now-turned-female. His long, black hair fell over his shoulders, long bangs nearly covering his eyes.

"You figure it out," Zuko muttered, rolling over onto her stomach so she could bury her face in her pillow. "I'll just stay right here and wait until I change back….Ouch."

"Yeah," Mai chuckled softly. "I wouldn't lie there like that if I were you. Your boobs might disagree."

"Now you tell me," She grumbled, sitting up all the way so she was on her knees. "These things are so annoying…How the hell do you put up with them?" A frown crossed her face as she cupped her own rather large breasts and gave them a few tentative squeezes.

Smirking, Mai placed one of his hands on top of Zuko's. "Well, for one thing, it'd help if you wore a proper bra."

"Don't you be touching them…" She snapped, hugging her chest protectively as she turned away slightly, her face flushing. "And it's not my fault yours don't fit. I didn't ask to be two sizes bigger than you."

"Leave it to the boob-lover to wind up with triple D's. Way to go," he said sarcastically, frowning at the fact she had pulled away like that.

"These ace bandages hurt like a bitch," Zuko said as she adjusted the wide one wrapped around her bosom. "But it's all I got until I'm normal."

Mai was silent for about a minute, looking at his girlfriend with an odd sad look. "You know, you really don't have to cover up if you're not going anywhere. I don't really care."

"It's a girl thing," she said quickly, looking away. "You of all people should be able to understand."

"Still…" He turned so he was half way kneeling on the bed as he leaned in to stroke her shoulder reassuringly. "You know even before I was a guy I liked girls too, right? And I know all about your little gay escapades…"

"Who told you about Aang?!" Zuko snapped, trying to crawl away, her whole face beet-red.

"As if it wasn't obvious," Mai rolled his eyes and picked up a mocking tone. "'I need to capture the Avatar', 'Look there he is!', 'I need to stop the Avatar', 'I gotta fight him', 'I gotta _fuck_ him'…"

"Shut up!" She slapped him hard across the face before turning all the way around, bringing her knees up to her chest to sulk.

"…I'm sorry 'your highness'." He frowned again and crawled up behind her so he could rest his chin on her shoulder. "I didn't realize it's still a touchy subject with you."

Zuko bit her lip and refused to look at him. "I didn't say you could touch me."

"Didn't say I couldn't either," Mai replied with a smirk as he reached a hand around to brush his fingertips along her stomach.

"Don't-," she whispered abruptly, shoving his hand away.

"For the love of-," he shook his head. "_Calm down_. I'm not going to hurt you or anything. You just have girly parts. It's not like you're dying."

"Might as well be…" She mumbled, though she loosened up and relaxed a bit.

"Alright then," he said as he turned her around to face him. "Just….For the love of - …Ugh…I'm not good at this….Uh… Just relax, and um, try to enjoy it while you have it, okay?" Mai wasn't used to being positive or reassuring, especially after spending years of being the negative voice in the group. But now that she became a he, and Zuko turned from boyfriend to distressed girlfriend, he had to do something…

"And how will I do that? No part of this is exactly 'pleasant'." Zuko grimaced, letting her hands fall to clutch at his hips.

"You'll see…" Smirking, Mai reached out to harshly grab her breasts.

At the sudden rough contact, Zuko yelped like a dog that had its paw stepped on. "Hey! What're you doing that for?"

"Now you know how it feels," he said sounding both amused and vengeful. "Mister 'randomly come up behind his girlfriend and fondles her chest while she's doing something'. Not exactly tactful or seducing."

"I thought you liked spontaneous shit like that…" she frowned, though she made no movement to stop his ministrations. "I'll stop then if you don't like it."

"No," Mai shook his head, smirking. "It's fine… It's random, weird, and sometimes painful, just like you."

"Thanks," Zuko grumbled, coming very close to stopping him but didn't. Instead she leaned back lightly and arched for more contact. Finally, she smiled. "I told you that you'd make a hot guy."

"Why, thank you," Mai pressed his lips against her throat. "You know, I never really thought about you being a girl…but now that I see it…Wow. You rival Ty Lee."

"Is that good or bad?" She arched a brow.

"Good," his voice lowered further as he kissed lightly up to her ear. "She was the only one I was ever willing to touch like this."

Zuko's face flushed and she dug her nails into his hips. "You're not going to…um…uh…'whip it out'…are you?"

"…So that's what that hot tingling tightness is…." Mai commented quietly.

"Ugh!" She slapped her palm to her forehead. "Yeah…That's what happens when you're a guy. So like…Think of something gross… Like Uncle naked with those two old chicks…Or Sensei in a strip club…"

In the background, the TV was aglow. It went from being a daily top twenty music hits show to the afternoon news. The news anchor came onto the screen and announced, in frantic Cantonese, that a weird email virus was spreading across the globe. She said that so far, the damage it'd done to regular people was wipe their hard drives, switch all their bookmarks to porno sites, and crash their systems. She then advised that if you got any strange emails just delete them. A bar came across the screen that said the top computer programmers were working on a way to fix it. However, the TV was just on for background noise and neither of the two were really paying attention to it.

"What if I don't want to?" Mai smirked, sliding his hands down her chest and stomach. He pushed her all the way back and straddled her.

"I really don't want to do this while I'm…not me…" Zuko frowned, putting her hands on his chest to keep him from doing anything else. "Besides, that's just your guy-ness talking."

"Well…" He sighed. "At least make it so it's not so damn tight. Your manly wisdom and experience should know how to do that."

"Fine," she rolled her eyes and then fumbled with his button and zipper.

"Better," he said quietly with a smile and then captured her lips in a light kiss. Rather than fight back, Zuko just went along with it.

However, as they were making out in earnest, and she was trying to get a certain something out of his trousers…She came upon an interesting discovery. "…No." Zuko pulled her head away quickly, breaking the kiss so fast Mai almost fell forward. "No fucking way."

"Um…_What_?" Mai blinked, sliding off her to one side of the bed, adjusting himself.

"…I'll just…" Zuko grumbled and crawled off the bed. She grabbed her Ipod off the nightstand and hobbled in a soul-less, depressed fashion down the hall.

Mai sighed and held his hand out to count something on her fingers. Even when they were their normal selves this was a pretty normal ritual that occurred when something bothered the little angst-bucket. He listened for the familiar slam and lock of the bathroom door, then the sound of her fumbling to sit on top of the counter, and then finally the faint sound of angry rock music playing, knowing she set the volume on the music player to full blast. It didn't happen often, but rather than lash out Zuko just decided to go somewhere private to sulk. Even as a male though, it still frustrated Mai to no end.

Sighing, he got up, refastened his pants, and went over to the bathroom to lean back against the door. "Zuko…Come on… What is it this time?"

Choosing to ignore him, Zuko just kept lightly singing along. "_Falling in the black…Slipping through the cracks…Falling to the depths can I ever go back..._"

Mai slammed his fist hard against the door. "Come on! Listening to your emo American music isn't going to help you any…What the hell is your problem?"

"What?!" She snapped, pulled her earbuds from her ears and slammed the small device beside her. "Okay, _what?_"

"Mind telling me why you randomly decided to trudge off?" Mai asked the closed door.

"…It's complicated," Zuko replied quietly, and Mai swore he could hear the faintest sound of sniffling.

"Don't give me that," he replied sternly. "What's the big deal?"

"Okay fine," she grumbled. "…You're bigger than me…There…happy?"

"…What?" Mai asked as if he hadn't heard.

"You're fucking _bigger_ than me, okay?" Zuko snapped, trying her hardest to keep her temper in check. It was even more difficult than usual because now there was the female moodiness on top of it.

"…Oh," he covered his mouth with his hand and burst into laughter, sliding down the door to the floor in the process. "Is that all? Oh Zuko….You're too much sometimes…"

"It's not funny!" She yelled, punching the door. "It's a matter of my dignity."

"Hahah…Right," Mai rolled his eyes. "Like me being bigger than you for a couple of days is really challenging your manhood. Not to mention the fact it's hilarious coming from you while you have obnoxiously large tits."

"Shut up!" Zuko punched the door again and then winced; this time it hurt somewhat.

Mai managed to get back to his feet and sighed, most of the laughter subsided. "Come on… Open the door. It's not that big of a deal."

"It is too!" She had to try her best not to sound like she was actually crying. "I'm just…going to stay in here like this until I'm normal again…"

"…And leave me all alone out here to deal with my man problem on my own?" He asked, though he sounded annoyed.

"Yeah."

"…_Fine_," Mai sighed, exasperated, and walked over to the kitchen to grab a set of keys. "Let's swap roles too. Look, I'll be you now. I'm pissed off. So I'm going to go storm out the door and wander the streets all night keeping you awake and worried because you'll have no idea if and when I'll come back. Let's see how that makes _you_ feel."

"…Mai," Zuko said quietly, unlocking the door and opening it a crack to see if he was serious.

"I'm out of here," he didn't even bother looking in her direction. "Give me a call when you can actually, you know, _make do_ for once instead of blowing shit out of proportion like a child." With that, Mai grabbed his wallet and phone and stepped out the front door.

Hearing the front door slam, Zuko sighed and slid off the counter to step out into the hall. She took a quick glance at the closed door and the TV before flopping onto the bed, her face buried in the pillows. She was too proud to admit she was wrong, to call Mai and apologize like she was whipped. Trying not to cry, she rolled over to the nightstand that had her laptop on it and flipped it open. She decided to do what she normally did when she fucked up as a guy. Mai would come home to a flat full of flowers and gifts all saying "I'm sorry" and "I'm a bitch" and other such little notes to show she felt bad. Yet again, another problem she brought upon herself.

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Thanks for reading!


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